Best Man Speech Opening Lines

  •  For those of you who do not know me my name is ( Best Man ) and I am the best man. I think I should tell you that the groom has specifically asked me to refrain from mentioning any previous girlfriends during this speech. Sadly, that cut the speech short by about 10 seconds, but he is the groom so it’s fine with me.

 

  •  Ladies and Gentleman it give's me great pleasure to be standing up here with a Boner ( now stutter and cough and correct yourself ) sorry a bonafide reason to stand up here and sing the praises of my best pal.

 

  •  My name is ( Best Man ) and it is my job as best man to tell you the truth about ( Groom ). A Fitness fanatic, a real gent, a genius and a hard worker – unfortunately he is none of those. However, he has many other outstanding qualities that have brought us all here today to celebrate his marriage to ( Bride ).

 

  • For those who dont know me i'm ( Best Man ) and i've known ( Groom ) since we were kids.  Its funny when i asked ( Groom ) about his memories from then he said Childhood is like the stag do, everyone remembers what you did, except you.

 

  • For those of you who do not know me, my name is ( Best Man ) and I am hugely privileged to have been asked to give a speech today. However, what more can I say about the groom that hasn't already been said on the Jeremy Kyle Show ?

 

  • My name is ( Best Man ), and I am the Best Man.( Bride ) really wanted a simple wedding and that’s what she got ... starting with the Groom.

 

  • My name is ( Best Man ) and I am the Best Man. It truly is impossible to praise the groom too highly ... in fact, while writing this speech. I have found it impossible to praise him at all.

 

  • You may wonder why I was chosen to be the best man today. If i’m honest I am the only one of ( Groom )’s friends that can read, write and in fact talk.

 

  • I shall never forget ( Groom )' s first words to ( Bride ) "Does this smell like chloroform to you? "

 

  • I must start by thanking (Bride) and (Groom) to allow me to play a small part in their big day (pause) and I would like to wish (Groom) good luck on his big wedding night with his small part.

 

  • Apparently the Groom had all sorts of trouble finding the Best Man. First of all he asked his most intelligent friend he said NO. Then he asked his funniest friend and he said NO. He then asked most handsome friend and he said NO. Finally he asked me, now after turning him down three times, i've caved in and agreed to be best man.

 

  • I was taught by my parents that if I had nothing good to say about someone to sit down and be quiet... (Sit down)

 

  • This is the sixth time today I have stood up from a warm seat with a piece of paper in my hand.

 

  • Ladies and Gentlemen - I’m about to speak about one of the cleverest, wittiest, most charming, most handsome men I know. And that’s not  my opinion. It’s what he told me to say.

 

  •  A wise man once told me the best man speech should last as long as it takes the groom to make love...so thank you all for coming...................And then sit down.

 

  • "Fornication"...sorry, for an occasion like this....

 

 

  • Start by saying that you have been asked by the grooms mum for the return of any outstanding house keys so that she could change the locks now that the groom was moving on to pastures new with his wife then get 10-15 women in the wedding party to get up and wander to the front and dump the keys on the table in front of you. If you want to add extra, lastly get a man to mince up to the table like Louis Spence and place key on table for a good laugh.

 

  • When (Groom) asked me to be his best man, naturally I had many questions. What had I done to deserve such an honour? Who had dropped out? Was I really the best he could come up with? Could I turn the job down and still expect an invitation to stuff myself and get drunk at his expense?

 

 

  • For those of you who do not know me, my name is ( Best Man ) and I have been given the honour of being ( Groom )'s best man. I have known ( Groom ) for as long as I can remember – actually that was this afternoon just before my tenth pint.

 

 

 

  • I am ( Best Man ), and I’m the Best Man. The Best Man's speech gives those present at the wedding an introduction to the Groom. Not all of you will know him very well ,by the time, I have finished this speech you will wish you did not know him at all.

 

 

  • My name is ( Best Man ) and I am the best man, although many of you would beg to differ on that title.

 

 

  • My name is ( Best Man ) and I am honoured to be ( Groom )’s best man. Those of you who have grown up with him, lived with him, and worked with him, will recognize some of his quirks and bad habits. ( Bride ) no doubt you know all these, but I am about to give you a reminder just in case.

 

 

  • For those who do not know me I am ( Best Man ), the best man. Apparently, it is not enough to say a few thank You’s these days when you are the Best Man but I am also supposed to sing the groom's praises and tell you all about his good points. Unfortunately, I can’t sing and I won’t lie.

 

 

  • I am your "Best Man" tonight ... a term that is unjustly appointed to me, and not deserved. As I am not really the best man, just a good bloke... the best man here is far more special. And that best man is ( Groom ).

 

 

  • You may wonder why I was chosen to be the best man today. If I’m honest I am the only one of ( Groom )’s friends that can read, write and in fact talk.

 

 

  • I hope to achieve three things with this speech love, laughter and a happy ever after. Well that’s me sorted next for the bride and groom.

 

  • Firstly I would like to start off my speech by congratulating the newly married couple and telling (Bride) how amazing she looks today. Oh, and you look magnificent too (Groom). He can be a bit sensitive and I don't want him to think I am showing favouritism.

 

  • To be called the best man on a day like this is somewhat of a contradiction. For i think today that title belongs to only one man, and that’s you, (Groom). You have attained the greatest gift a man can wish for, and that’s the love of a woman as beautiful and caring as (Bride).